A friend sent me an invitation to join a storytelling writing group, facilitated by a mutual acquaintance Dr. Marie Olwell whose sister had written a book, Have I Got A Story For You, on this specialized form of writing. Intrigued, I signed up without any preconceived notions.
In a personal storytelling writing group, your thoughts are directed to past events. These past events are described by each writer with the intent to evoke images and feelings. Ghosts of the past can and do emerge. Framing memories can dramatically alter one’s perceptions. A “story” is a vehicle for individuals to interpret past experiences as positive or negative. Writing a story about past events is transformative, in that it enables the writer to “reframe” what the experience means to him or her. It always begins with a writing “prompt.”
Some form of writing group has been a part of my existence for the last 15 years. Each group had its own distinct flavor, but they were all similar in their intent to allow individuals to critique and be critiqued. Experience has taught me that the writing group experience is often helpful, sometimes painful, and every once in a while, brutal.
I was hoping the storytelling writing group was much of the former, and very little of the latter. With an air of expectation and a dash of excitement, I walked into the conference room. Four women were seated around a long tea-colored table. Dr. Marie, the facilitator, was the only woman I knew but the others were smiling in a welcoming and friendly way.
Oh, I was excited as I sat down, not only were the chairs comfortable but they had wheels, so I could move around a bit if I needed to. This may be the best writing group yet I thought to myself. Never underestimate the power of wheeled chairs and friendly people.
We began the traditional way, by introducing ourselves and sharing a few personal details, and then Marie asked us to share our expectations of this group experience. She explained to us that this was a writing, not a therapy group. The intent was to share our stories, but no critiquing would be involved. Hmmm . . . Well, this was going to be a very different kind of group—no therapy, no critiquing, lots of writing and sharing.
Now where did that skeptical inner voice come from, she was yelling in my head, “Are you crazy? You don’t want to share your life stories, besides, you don’t do this kind of writing. You’re gonna be sorry” Pesky thing that she is, always a downer, telling me I cannot or do not want to do something. I ignored her, well, for the most part.
Our task was to write our stories, share as much as or little detail as we were comfortable with based on the “prompts” Dr Marie provided. Each two-hour group would include at least two writing prompts. Our first was to write an essay completing the phrase “I am grateful for. . .” We were instructed not to be concerned with anything but writing our stories. She reminded us we would share our work but not judge or seek flaws. How freeing, no rewrites– sort of like-life.
After about 15 minutes, we were instructed to stop, and we took turns reading our stories out loud. Our responses to one another were supportive, affirming, and encouraging. It was easy to share. I knew this was going to be a safe place to write and connect with myself and the other women.
Since the beginning, each group has been different because of our story prompts. We’ve written about: our birth, favorite birthday, first day of school, favorite or least favorite home, a time when we were greatly embarrassed, and many more.
As we share we learn about other’s lives, shared commonalities, and differences of our life experiences. Marie will ask, “How did it feel to share this with the group?” or
“What is it like to write about this after all these years have passed?” There has never been a time when a story has been shared and someone in the group has been unable to affirm and support the person sharing their story. Sometimes highly personal and emotional, whatever is shared is accepted in an environment of caring and concern.
The constant themes have been empowering ourselves and one another and trusting our intuition. Story after story taps into these issues.
Collectively and individually we are able to acknowledge, appreciate, honor, and extol our similarities and our differences in ourselves and one another. I encourage everyone who loves to write to find a storytelling writing group or create one of your own. The journey is incredible, and the healing comes in the telling.